Public Party Foul: South Jersey

G'day all, J.G. here...as usual,

The CRABs and I have been in southern New Jersey for some time ((which absolutely trumps north Jersey, I thangk you. (actually South Jersey should succeed from Jersey in general because south jersey doesn't suck but the state as a whole is running for worst in the nation with the likes of Massachusetts and Pennsylvania)) and we have deemed it party foul worthy that the wreckage from last weeks storm still hasn't been taken care of. People have been out of work, roads have been closed, people have been without TV,(how are they supposed to watch Cory in the house?) and teeth cannot be found. I'm pretty sure that when Hurricane Stamos passed through last year, the clean-up was quick and easy. We lost some valuable lives (E-40, Bam-Bam Flinstone, Scrappy Doo) but had key players like Mighty Joe Young and Babas Maw (see below) step up and do some top-tier cleaning. No excuse south jersey...being kinda lazy. Enjoy that sharps SJ...such a hufflepuff move.



PACE!

-J.G.

3 Down and a Sharp's to go

With DiCrabrio's internet down I offered to do the Potter post of the day. I feel like I should be getting a party foul for what you're about to read, and I would humbly accept it. I started the Sorcerers Stone the other day in hopes that I could at least finish the first 2 books by the time the final movie came out. Thus far I have completed 3 chapters and that is all. I haven't really had much time, been working a ton lately, but nonetheless no excuse to not read about Mr. Potter's adventures. I will add, however, that in just my brief time re-reading this book, I have grown to hate the Dursely's more and notice that Dumbledore is ultra-boss. So great job Rowling. I plan on reading more tomorrow, but as for now I must meditate and rest for I am sick as a fish out of the water.

If you just watched the video, then ya suck.

So wish me luck as I continue my quest through Hogwarts and whatever.
PACE

It's a Banger: Multiple Party Fouls

CRAB Nation we have a lot to discuss within the few thousand pixel's here. With one of the CRABs embarking on a quest this upcoming week, (in which he will pursue further domination) we decided to have a CRABtogether before he set sail on the bloody wicked seas of courage. Within our time sea-dwelling, multiple party fouls were given or recognized. Barbossa (future name change coming? stay tuned) was given the responsibility of inviting all CRABs over for a time of clawing and ballin, but failed to remember to invite FAG team member DiCrabrio. I myself received an invite and of course MAD team member Crabitz was already at the tank. For not inviting Leo, Crabtain receives a party foul. Enjoy that Sharp's, Cpt.

Next I will be dealing with my party foul, quite an honest mistake, honestly. I witnessed a dog defecating in the street today, and rather than stopping the dog (somehow) I turned to fellow FAG team member Leo D. and chuckled. Because of my foolishness, Leo ran over the stink with the truck and rather than drowning the smell, he intensified it. The doo doo was stuck on the back trailer tire, which followed me throughout the forest and as I winced in pain and regretted I ever mad eye contact with the little pooper. The sharp's is mixed with vanilla coke and is quite cold.

The third party foul and possibly the biggest of the post, was Leo DiCrabrio's failure to attend a planned CRAB hangout. The other three CRABs were chillin in the tank and DiCrabio says he'll be there, only never to show up. Hope the Sharps goes down smoothly.

The final is Len Crabitz's disgusting gesture; dropping 4 perfectly good burger buns on the ground. Shake and bake len, shake and bake. Hope your sharp's is warm when you drink it and you get sick, tool.

PACE from the CRABs because we're all chillin right now.



They aren't just hanging with us because we were in the same movie, they're hanging with us because they want to be us

Public Party Foul: Consistently Sucking

Look I don't usually do things like this, deem public party fouls practically out of the blue, but I just felt it necessary tonight. I want to start making the blog more fan-aimed, where people can come and read up on movie reviews, sports, music, and anything that pleases the mind. I didn't really have a feel where to start, I mean I've seen so many dang movies lately but I don't want to go on ranting about them just yet... because Brad Garrett is pissing me off. I hate walking in front of the screen and seeing his awkwardly rolled shoulders and 7 foot head mumbling something about how everybody loves his nasally challenged Italian foot-soldier TV brother more than him, and thats why he turned out to be a tool. His angry Eustace clone of a father sits on the lazy-boy, beer in hand, verbally beating the guy to a pulp. Love frank, by the way, only character making the show half-viewable when you're waiting for your mushroom hair-cutted brother to get back to the house so you can start playing FIFA or something. Anyway, nobody likes him, Capish? His own mother in the show gave him no attention, clear sign that you suck there Robbie Barone. What makes a character suck? You can blame the writers all you want but I'm blaming Garrett 100%. Brad you get multiple thumbs down this week and the first ever public party foul for a crime worse than murder: Sucking.

Need I explain myself even further?

Have the most Crabby Day possible kids. PACE

Party Foul: Craptain...

In a completely idiotic turn of events, I will be accepting a Party Foul this week for a recurring typo in the CRABs introduction.  In my stunning idiocy I repeatedly typed Craptain instead of Crabtain in my introduction of Crabtain Barbossa.  I'd like to take this time to apologize to Crabtain Barbossa for my stupidity and I will gladly accept an ice cold Sharp's Miller Non-Alcoholic Beer.  I will drink with my head hung in shame for dishonoring a CRAB even if accidental. It will never happen again Sirs.

Have a Crabby Day Folks.

DiCrabs signing out.